2 days ago
Tonight. April 19, 2019
I get to the point where I don’t know if I can do this by myself any longer. It’s ridiculously arduous and I’m just me.
But then I remember what I can accomplish when I want and need. I am strong and fierce, invincible, and fabulous me! (My Village tells me I am so I am going to go with it!) I want to live!
And suddenly I look into this water color sky and I see hope. Even better: I feel hope. I will get there. It’s just taking longer and it seems I have gotten every side effect and more throughout my 1st treatment phase.
Without even stepping out on my balcony, because my blood has changed with the chemo and I am cold *all* the time, I just captured these from my living room windows and would love to share the beauty.
The incredible and ever amazing beauty of having a Pacific Ocean view from one’s living room... I never ever forget my great good fortune. Good and bad, I must focus on the beauty.
I wanted to travel more in this life. More than anything. And not have it limited to a partner’s whims and desires and family locations ::sigh:: Dammit.
But look at what the universe gave me tonight! No, I’m not so narcissistic as to think it was my own personal sunset (but it could be, right?), but the ability to be awake at this perfect time and choose to see it instead of *any*thing else gives me courage to continue till my doctor returns next week.
Do note the treetops buried in the fog; they look like islands! And I got to include Mt. Tamalpais in the more northern shots, before the foothills and peninsula drop into the fog to rise again out at Pt. Reyes... It’s miracle, a medicine that works. It feels like the best reason to stay alive.
Beauty in nature, miles on my beach and cliffs...in Ballet and other art forms. Literature, performance art, music... Chocolate. Love.
I’ll take it. All of it.
Yeah. This was for me tonight.
#Nowness #fairytaleskies #sunsetsniper #pacificasunset #sunsetporn #sunset #skyporn #sunsetsihaveknownandloved #epicsky #instasunset #watercolorsky #oceantherapy #sunsettherapy #pacificocean #oceanlove #oceanview #paintbynumberseveningsky